The Town Movie Review

 I decide to go see The Town. You Know the fuckin bank robbery movie you Irish fuck.  To say the lest it was pretty good. I will apologize now for talking on a boston accent for the next week or so, but the movie was good. As much as I hate Ben Afflic's no talent ass he actually made a movie that wasn't a total turd. Basiclly the movie moved at a steady pace until ol' Benny boy got a case of Stockholm Syndrome and tried to wife the bitch that could ruin his world. Why do guys want to go straight when they meet some broad and screw their friends over. Benny boy had a good thing going on.  You know knock over a few trucks, rob a few banks, and make some easy money. Bank Robbery is pretty simple leave no evidence, go burn so evidence and lay low and wash the money you know. The only painful part of this movie was listening to Boston Sports talk. I hate the BoSox and to have to listen to WEEI Boston Sports Hub I'll rather take a double root canal while listening to babies cry while they get slaughtered. 

So back to the movie it has some great one liners like " who's Carr are we goin take" to go fuck some guys up. Ol' Benny boy play the compassionate tuff guy who didn't want to kill anyone. One day he decides he's over the life and wants to get out.  But his friends have other plans for him. Benny had a troubled childhood and well basically fucked offed in he head.  The first mistake that brings the crew down is one of the guys works for the electronics company and knows how to operate the hardware. I kinds Hard to look at people doing life in prison I get nervous over 6 to 8 months for my bullshit or house arrest and Benny boys paps is doing 5 life sentences made it seem so real and gave an interesting perspective to the movie. So the guys get in the mix by pulling a job and now they got heat. So what to they do now?

Fuck it this movie is starting to bore the shit out of me. I think I'll take a piss. But Benny boy wants to marry the one person that can put him in jail.  Good fuckin move I tell you. So the FBI got their hooks into he girl and shit starting to get fucked up.  Holy shit their going rob Fenway park. Isn't that sac religious in Boston. How the fuck does a chowder head knock over the BoSox. These guys are fucking nuts. They junkie going hand them their asses and sell them out. Why does every man get brought down by a fucking bitch.  Really. So Benny boy goes ape shit clips the boss and runs.  So his broad is safe and there is nothing too it so get the fuck out of town asshole but no he want to see the girl  even thought she selling his ass up river like a 99 cent hooker but his dumb ass need to see her. He should of just keep going but no we have a climactic climax. No Benny was smart he ran and left the whole fucking town in his rear view mirror.  Benny know he will see Claire on this side or the other. 

help me help you

Shredder Woods

Shredder Woods is doing what he does best but his ball in the cup, avoid hazards, and blasting all the haters. I had a felling tiger was going be on fire and it's not even Sunday yet. I wonder if he is bumping Drake "Forever" on his Ipod or maybe Fort Minor "Remember The Name" and defiantly Swiss Beats  "It's me Bitches" as he run through the field of the Masters. Now I don't know if he is going to win because we know the field just isn't going to lay down and let him have his way with them just yet. But he is romancing the average golf fan again. This guy is a beast on the course. He gets as many Birdies as he does bird. It's only time be for he is out slaying chicks and cashing checks. Tiger needs this. Even thought I think he is full of shit about being a sex addict. He is a competitor at every thing he does and I swear he is the one man on the plant that can take the crown from Wilt Chamberlain or ever Ron Jeremy. If I had the money to bet and could get a good line on Tiger right now I would lay weight. If he wins we will be talking about his domination on the course in the biggest event on the biggest stage in golf. We will revere him for the competitor he is, beating all odds in the largest of magnifying glasses, as the whole world watched  waited for him to break. If he does break and I dont think he will that will also be as epic. I want to see a Johnny Mack kind of melt down. I want him to spear some one in the gallery with the 16th hole flag pole like a warrior from 300. Dropping Fuck You's like Pac-Man Jones making it rain at the strip club. (side note: remember to always support your Single Crack Head Mothers of America local chapter) Better yet I would love to see the opening of Last Boy Scout where Tiger is running up the 18th hole with a nickle plated Glock 33 blowing the knee caps off his caddy and competitions and take his life with a shot to the dome right on the green. Blaze of Glory Mother Fuckers. In reality he will probably say his family is most important and he just lucky to be in the field with such blah blah blah bullshit lies and more bullshit followed by buy my shit I'm selling. Even better if he wins it will be the same speech and bullshit when he should walk to the podium, get the green jacket and say " Fuck all you Haters, Did You Forget I'm Mother Fucking Bitches Slaying Tiger God Damn Woods, I'm Mother Fucking King Kong In This Jungle."  Flip the media the bird have Don Magic Juan, 10 chicks waiting for him, a bottle of crystal iced out in  a private jet going  Vegas and have an Orgy. Mans Game.

Imagine how  Dave Chappelle would be killing it on Tiger if he was on the air "I'm Rich Bitches".

(Damn I realize now how much I need a vacation)

Might As Well Face It....I'm a Sex Addict

So in a public relationship world were when someone of public opinion gets caught cheating on their wives that is a sex addiction problem. It is to the point where Dr. Drew has a reality show trying to treat this so called addiction. Meth is an addiction. Heroine is an addiction. These addiction if not treated eventually kill you or you end up being a homeless guy living in a van down by the river smoking dick for crack. Sex addiction i guess can kill if you gets HIV or AIDS but in these days of modern technology and rapid medical advancements, you can know live a long life after contracting the HIV. Look at Magic Johnson he is still going strong. Now you catch a kid then your financially trapped in prison for the next 18 years and like 50 cent states "have a baby bye me baby be a millionaire." Most women think of their pussy is a form of currency in this modern area like the Ruble or the Pound. With a woman sense of reality wrapped by MTV and VH1 and a new found sense of entitlement to be rich and not have to work the only way the feel they can accomplish this is by hooking up with a rich older man who will pay there bills and comfort them the lives of their sugar daddies. There are web sites dedicated to this idea that if you female, cute, whorish and have a set of fake tits that some desperate guy is going pull the ol' Anna Nicole Smith for you die and leave you his money. Than did work out she is dead and got nothing. But Anna unlike most of these wannabe My Space and Face Book models was a Playmate and a Guess model for several years and made a good living before she married a dieing millionaire. Women will try to trap a man. Women are worse then men, the will manipulate the truth, stalk a mans family, extortionist to the all might pursuit of getting money for nothing. Hookers and Strippers are at least honest. You give them money and they will give you sex and Prostitution is the oldest business still going strong on the planet. Women have figured out the get rich quick game. Sleep with a public figure by throw themselves at them and either get pregnant or hire Gloria Aldered to represent them and get a six figure pay day to keep it out of the press and make it all go away. How ever they got to do it most attractive women will trade pussy for fame and money. Every predominate actress in Hollywood had do suck dick and visit the casting couch at some point in their carrier to advance it. Website like  TheDirty.com have even made a living by calling these girls out and giving them free publicity. They warn men against spend the hard earn money on dream killers as they call them. They even has exposed that there are women out there buy a book called "The Platinum Theory" which is a book teaching women how to hook up with rich men and get their bills paid. Women who buy into this is stupid. There are now 4 ways to get rich in America. 1. Law suits. 2. Lottery 3.be born rich 4. Marry a rich man divorce him ands 3 years and take half. wash rinse and go gold digging for the next victim. For time and argument concerns we will just throw hard work and talent out the window. 

Men your not a sex addict. Sex is normal. We are animals remember in the most sophisticated from. Our need for a man of dominance to spread his seed is seen threw out the history of humanity and in various cultures. Mormons have more than one wife and it their belief. Kings had wives and concubines. I'm going hit on a few points and people real quick just remember your not a sex addict. Now if you were to force yourself on women your either a creeper or a sexual predator and you need to get so help and Bubba in prison will give you all the love you need.  .

1. Tiger Woods - Easy pay day

      Tiger is the best golfer in the world. He likes to go out and party. Hes is the face on a multimillion dollar marketing empire. He sells everything from shavers to Buick's. Hes multinational and sells products all over the world. Even has his own Gatorade. Jordan never had Gatorade. Because of his image he has the boat and the houses and the cars and the Trophy Wife. Why when the world is your oyster do you get married? It's good for the house hold image to sell products. Good role model to kids and to promote his brand. He is easily extortable to protect his image. He bangs his way thought out the world keeps it under wraps but then gets caught. Instead of say this is who I am are marriage is a business proposition deal with it. The tabloids run with it all these girls including his wife are getting paid and he has to save his family. NO he has to save his brand. I know guys who can't even get off with out having a fiance/wife and banging chicks on the side.  Tiger be a man say " I'm rich bitches. Elan Fuck you and Ladies I'm open for business." Instead it going be this whole dramatic thing to get back in the good graces of sponsors. Look win and it will all come back 10 fold. 

2. Kobe Bryant- White girl cry's rape and bangs 2 other dudes right after.

    Lets be honest Kobe straight got hustled. Some young white girl basically (in my mind ) constructed the nature of the encounter for money. She willing slept with Kobe told her boyfriend he flipped and she said she was raped to protect herself. It funny how a girl can be a total whore cheat on her boyfriend say it was I was raped or drugged and it turns out she was willing and didn't want him to be mad. It just happened to a friend of mine brother. So she then decides it rape and show up with 2 other samples of DNA besides Kobe on her panties and trys to get paid. Media destroys Kobe loses his sponsorship with Adidas and among others and is a bad man. Kobe pays the girl to go away and goes on a terror and proves he's the best ever and now make more in endorsement than he did. He still cheats on his wife but she know no one else can put her in the life she has become accustom to so the marriage is now a business partnership. Kobe pays and the girls go away. he learned how to keep his game tight because once again all a cleat chaser wants if free money for something they already have.

3. Jesse James- no one is suprised.

     Jesse you need to be with a stripper or porn star. Your a biker with trash from long beach. Guys like us cannot date Miss American wholesomeness. The sex is boring. No one is surprised you cheated on Sandra. She looks like a dude and isn't even hot. Dude really. You tried suburban life and Hollywood its not you. You and glorified mechanic. You build bad as bikes. Do what you do best. Kick ass and take names and be you. This is great for you and your brand. The Nazi shit I could see coming from a mile away. Your not a sex addict your a scumbag. Be proud of being a scumbag, band tatted whores and sell bikes. You don't need the money. Sandra want a bad boy but as history show us Bad Boys and Good Girls don't make it. Your not the domesticating type. Can keep a dog on a leash. he heeds to run. Go ahead and sleep with as many suicide girls as you can and let Sandra go. I hear Jannie is off the Meth and maybe you kids can give it another go. 

So wrapping up guys are only as good as their options. With money and fame and being a household name the options are greater. If your unhappy in your marriage the be adults get divorced and go bang away. Jeter is doing it right. There nothing wrong with being a playboy and getting the props for doing it right. Happy couples don't cheat. Couples that are a part and too busy for each other will find someone to get they sexy on with are going to cheat and get divorced. We as human beings have become people of convenience. Why go look for sex when your having it thrown right at you for all the wrong reason. Remember people its not love it just sex and if it becomes love than you just not meant to be with that person and move on. If more people were honest and just own being who they are then all this internet reality TV and TMZ drama would go away and so would the attention. Men also have the need just like women to be in control. Some of these situation are about control and not sex and the need to be empowered. Sex in some peoples mind is power. It how a person defines dominance. The only reason people are faithful is a biblical responsibility and the fear of society. Several people experiment with open relationships are are very happy. Porn stars can go to work do gay porn and come home to their wives why do you ask? Because its a Job. Sex Addiction is some clever way of making excesses of cheating to avoid the consequences and make people feel sorry for them. Drop the puppy dog role because I'm not buying it. As for myself, I don't cheat and I don't get into relationships unless I know I can give 100%. If I feel I need to cheat I break it off and move on. I don't make excuses and I would prefer for a girl to hate me for me and not for fucking her over in the end. I also only try a relationship once ever 4 or so years and I am a selfish person and so I stay single. One day I will meet the next on winch is projected based on my current path will be around 2013. So I may sound like a jaded ass in this article but I only trying to speak the truth on how some women operate is all. There are good ones out there somewhere. I think they all live in Europe or maybe Australia.

Racism Now On Xbox Live

You ever sat at home and said to yourself " Where the hell did my kid learn to talk like he's done 20 years in Pelican Bay?" I don't have kids but I do know quite a few parents and I feel parents need to rip the Xbox out of there kids hands and beat the holy shit out of them like my parents did. I would not say I am easily offended; I'm more offensive then most when I speak my mind but I try to remain respectful and never attack anyone on the cultural backgrounds. From time to time I use the work Nigga to my friends who I got a NAACP clearance from but would never say it to a person who I was not friends with or pronounce it in the slavery term of Nigger. I quote rap music from time to time and like the cracker I am will sing along to NWA fuck the police but would not say get up and karaoke it in Harlem at the Apollo Theater. As a society were just not there yet. In My Opinion parents are to busy losing their jobs, having affairs and introverted on their own lives of selfishness to worry about what their kids do until there embarrassed by them or lose the oh so precious social stature. If you were not ready for kids then you should not of had them until you drunken drugged lace clubbing day and band whoring was over. Kid change you and as a parent it is your responsibility to raise them proper. Partying is done, Drunken Orgy's with a band is over. Blowing and then Blowing off you job is over. Going out doesn't exist anymore unless it to catch the latest Pixar Joint at  6:00pm so you can be home in bed by nine. As much as a gift children are the are a huge responsibility like a prison sentence. Do it right and Jr buying you a Mercedes when he gets that big six or seven figure job. Do it wrong he's doing time with his dad in Chino for credit card fraud and a potential race crime because CPS took him away after your 2nd DUI with him in the car.

So to my case in point. I'm a regular on Xbox Live. I know several Admin with in Microsoft and I also work occasionally for WCG and MLG promoting tournaments and coordinating events all over the globe. And they pay me. So when I get so tweenager on ther telling me " He is going to rape me in the ass with a niggers dick then fuck my sister with said same dick" kinda pisses me off and show me why the rest of the world hates the USA. I'm sure one of his moms boyfriends made reference to that at some point in his life but also allowing a kid to play an adult game is also questionable parenting. Look kids you can be tough on line but one day your going see me at some tournament and I will disqualify you for your conduct. I have kick 2 Teams out of the same tournament for being assholes. I have even had a gamer take a swing at me, have me laugh in his face and it took 6 people and 2 security gaurds from keeping me from wrecking the kids life. Good thing he was 17 but still you don't walk up spit and take a swing because you lost and were told going in you should win. We are not entitled to nothing in this world except Death and that is the only guarantee in life.

People to this day are homophobic and Racist and Xbox is there new platform and unfortunately there between the ages of 10-25.

Bottom Line you kill avatars in a fantasy based C+C2 world. You think and probably believe you can hold a gun and kill someone and decide to do it because you play the game and that how the real world is. No the real world is full of guys and gals like myself who will whoop your ass if you ISH with us. I'll fuck a person up and please try to pull a gun on me because I will love to have a reason to claim self defense when I do end your life. I let a lot of things ride because prison, law suits, and losing my job is not worth it. I think Xbox should have shock collars for anyone under 21 in the USA (Europe is not needed cause most games get banned of these nature and people are generally more respectful in online communities) and a list of words should send 4000 volts to their dome one time and there cured. trust me the risk of a swift ass kick triggered by key words will solve a lot of problems in the world. My dad disciplined me as a child and whipped my ass good a few time. I turned out fine. Fuck time out kick you kid in the face it will work better.

Your kids are reflection of you and if you kid is online being a racist bastard then you as his parent must be one to. Put the crack pipe down and raise your kid otherwise don't be surprised when he goes Columbine on your ass or his school and sit there and tell me he was a good kid. I won't buy it. As the great Sheriff Buford T. Pussard would say " When I get home I'm going punch your Mama straight in the mouth." or Chris Rock "America beat you kids. I know if I said thing your kids say my Momma would of  kick my ass." Remember your parents not Friends. 

WAREHOUSE 13 NEW DREAM GIRL CRUSH

So this is my new dreamkiller. She goes by the name of Allison Scagliotti. She is on the TV series on SYFY called Warehouse 13 which thanks to Hulu recommendation I discover this awesome show. She is a youngster I think 20 max. Perfect age. She plays a character that is super smart nerdy computer hacker who is always getting into adventures and trouble on the show. I would like to think of her as that in real life and my late night exploration in my mind. She is a good looking chick. Spunky and goes to school at some JV in the valley. Almost want to make me take a class with her but as we been learning in life the Fantasy is better than reality. She an Actress so she is probably a little shallow and been on TV for a minute.  I tend to dream and aim high in life and with the power on money and wealth one day I will accrued like barrels oil , I just might meet her if she ever does a stint in rehab and loses everything or has a sex tape the leaks out. I would never wish my life on anyone but for now she is my new IT girl. Now she will probably never cross my path because for one I don't stalk chicks. I have far more better things to do with my life and two i would want to actually talk to her and realize she is either a total moron or a bitter jaded bitch. I just like to think of her as the average corny girl I can have a few cocktails with and maybe listen to the new Coheed and Cambria joint with. There new album by the way will be epic like we come to expect from Claudio and Mike and the rest of the gang. She a red head so automatically she is good in bed. I would not change anything about her because she only exist on my lap top on a web site that goal is to liquidize my brain so it can be sucked out easier. Little do they know my mind is like Chernobyl is today; empty vast waste land that is toxic for the next 50+ decades and will in turn kill them. I would never suggest trying to diffuse the ticking Nuke that lives inside my head. I wish I was more normal but I been twisted and jaded to the point of no return. She could live in my mind next protected from the evil in the one happy place once occupied by Clash of the Titans. At least til I lose interest which will happen pretty quick but at least this nerd chick tomboy is my pick of the moment.

Crash of the Titan

Why must Hollywood keep crushing my childhood memories by remaking classic movies into steaming piles of shit. Clash of the Titans was a epic week of slacking in middle school. 7 hours of avoiding work, lectures, and being able to have snacks in class. Awww and there was a girl. Even back then I was the secret hook up guy that no girl want anyone to know there were hooking up. It was one of my better school memories. As with the rest of my life the older I get the more things change and the more people crap on my childhood. Stop remaking classic. Star Wars Runined. G.I. Joe kiss Them good bye, Garfield was an abomination of man and country. Now this. Even Terminator Salvation and following TV series time travel can not save. Can I get a win here people. What's next Voltron ? Tron? A-Team?. Alf? Yes, Hollywood is going for the Knock Out blow. Next they will make a Zelda movie and destroy the last shreds of my childhood. They already took Mario Brothers from me and the Ninja Turtles.

What the Fuck is wrong with people in Hollywood. You cannot  recreate and capture a virgin raw original idea that was epic at the time it was conceived and relative the moment. What was great about that one moment in time is how it changed you life and related to the events at the time. Madonna will never be as good as she was when she was the material good. She gets close but will never be the original. Just like Prince will never be as good as Purple rain and Stallone will never be as good as John Rambo First Blood or Rocky. I would like to be in one of these cracked out meetings where dip shits are say " You know what we really need to do is make another Scarface. People will line up for miles to see this and lets cast Carlos Mencia to play Tony. Well have Michael Bay direct it and lets get the writers from Top Gun to hammer out a script. Epic 100 million box office on open weekend. Lets just Fuck the American people out of 14 bucks by making it 3-D as well. " Well old ass crust Asshole Holly Weird society  Fuck you right back.

As for the movie it moved rather quick and the action scenes were average at best. Medusa look like the snake from Anaconda and I'm glad it can still find rolls in the tight economy because we know the world dose not need Anaconda 7. The dude that I called Chewback the black magain pile of twigs was cool in the effect department but I figured when he pushed his Energon Cube into his chest he should of blown that snake to all hell. Also the climax to the move of defeating the Cracken was lame. Hey buddy look into the eyes for your ex-girlfriend and you turn to stone. Doesn't that happen in real life usually? I'm just saying. And no R2-d2 owl. The owl was the best part. "just leave that here we don't need it." the owl would of save half of your asses. I'm also glad to see Hades is still smoking Heroine and looks like Gerard Way via the Three Cheers from Sweet Revenge album. Flash back off Gerard on a booze and coke bender. Good times. I wonder if Hades found his precious.

The only 4 saving points of the movie.
1. Drunklando and I talk shit and made jokes threw out the whole flick. I'm sure we would of pissed every one else off in the movie theater if it wasn't such a pile of crap. We made sure people were entertained. Imagine Science Mystery Theater 3000 status.
2. Alexa Davalos as Andromeda was blazing hot with her lazy eye and lazy boob. I now remember why toga party's are always, always a great idea plus she was immortal which is nice. Also when pops give you a chick for saving the world you know your getting laid.
3. The Persian hunters were hilarious. the whole movie I was thinking " Tango Sukka". If you gamer you'll get that joke (MW2).
4. The Expandable trailer 2 words "HOLY SHIT".

Save your money spend your dollar at Red Box. Unless you need to see it in 3D then realize Avatar takes this movie out to the back 40 and puts it down with a .45 cal bullet like a sick Pegasus.