The Town Movie Review

 I decide to go see The Town. You Know the fuckin bank robbery movie you Irish fuck.  To say the lest it was pretty good. I will apologize now for talking on a boston accent for the next week or so, but the movie was good. As much as I hate Ben Afflic's no talent ass he actually made a movie that wasn't a total turd. Basiclly the movie moved at a steady pace until ol' Benny boy got a case of Stockholm Syndrome and tried to wife the bitch that could ruin his world. Why do guys want to go straight when they meet some broad and screw their friends over. Benny boy had a good thing going on.  You know knock over a few trucks, rob a few banks, and make some easy money. Bank Robbery is pretty simple leave no evidence, go burn so evidence and lay low and wash the money you know. The only painful part of this movie was listening to Boston Sports talk. I hate the BoSox and to have to listen to WEEI Boston Sports Hub I'll rather take a double root canal while listening to babies cry while they get slaughtered. 

So back to the movie it has some great one liners like " who's Carr are we goin take" to go fuck some guys up. Ol' Benny boy play the compassionate tuff guy who didn't want to kill anyone. One day he decides he's over the life and wants to get out.  But his friends have other plans for him. Benny had a troubled childhood and well basically fucked offed in he head.  The first mistake that brings the crew down is one of the guys works for the electronics company and knows how to operate the hardware. I kinds Hard to look at people doing life in prison I get nervous over 6 to 8 months for my bullshit or house arrest and Benny boys paps is doing 5 life sentences made it seem so real and gave an interesting perspective to the movie. So the guys get in the mix by pulling a job and now they got heat. So what to they do now?

Fuck it this movie is starting to bore the shit out of me. I think I'll take a piss. But Benny boy wants to marry the one person that can put him in jail.  Good fuckin move I tell you. So the FBI got their hooks into he girl and shit starting to get fucked up.  Holy shit their going rob Fenway park. Isn't that sac religious in Boston. How the fuck does a chowder head knock over the BoSox. These guys are fucking nuts. They junkie going hand them their asses and sell them out. Why does every man get brought down by a fucking bitch.  Really. So Benny boy goes ape shit clips the boss and runs.  So his broad is safe and there is nothing too it so get the fuck out of town asshole but no he want to see the girl  even thought she selling his ass up river like a 99 cent hooker but his dumb ass need to see her. He should of just keep going but no we have a climactic climax. No Benny was smart he ran and left the whole fucking town in his rear view mirror.  Benny know he will see Claire on this side or the other. 

help me help you

Shredder Woods

Shredder Woods is doing what he does best but his ball in the cup, avoid hazards, and blasting all the haters. I had a felling tiger was going be on fire and it's not even Sunday yet. I wonder if he is bumping Drake "Forever" on his Ipod or maybe Fort Minor "Remember The Name" and defiantly Swiss Beats  "It's me Bitches" as he run through the field of the Masters. Now I don't know if he is going to win because we know the field just isn't going to lay down and let him have his way with them just yet. But he is romancing the average golf fan again. This guy is a beast on the course. He gets as many Birdies as he does bird. It's only time be for he is out slaying chicks and cashing checks. Tiger needs this. Even thought I think he is full of shit about being a sex addict. He is a competitor at every thing he does and I swear he is the one man on the plant that can take the crown from Wilt Chamberlain or ever Ron Jeremy. If I had the money to bet and could get a good line on Tiger right now I would lay weight. If he wins we will be talking about his domination on the course in the biggest event on the biggest stage in golf. We will revere him for the competitor he is, beating all odds in the largest of magnifying glasses, as the whole world watched  waited for him to break. If he does break and I dont think he will that will also be as epic. I want to see a Johnny Mack kind of melt down. I want him to spear some one in the gallery with the 16th hole flag pole like a warrior from 300. Dropping Fuck You's like Pac-Man Jones making it rain at the strip club. (side note: remember to always support your Single Crack Head Mothers of America local chapter) Better yet I would love to see the opening of Last Boy Scout where Tiger is running up the 18th hole with a nickle plated Glock 33 blowing the knee caps off his caddy and competitions and take his life with a shot to the dome right on the green. Blaze of Glory Mother Fuckers. In reality he will probably say his family is most important and he just lucky to be in the field with such blah blah blah bullshit lies and more bullshit followed by buy my shit I'm selling. Even better if he wins it will be the same speech and bullshit when he should walk to the podium, get the green jacket and say " Fuck all you Haters, Did You Forget I'm Mother Fucking Bitches Slaying Tiger God Damn Woods, I'm Mother Fucking King Kong In This Jungle."  Flip the media the bird have Don Magic Juan, 10 chicks waiting for him, a bottle of crystal iced out in  a private jet going  Vegas and have an Orgy. Mans Game.

Imagine how  Dave Chappelle would be killing it on Tiger if he was on the air "I'm Rich Bitches".

(Damn I realize now how much I need a vacation)

Might As Well Face It....I'm a Sex Addict

So in a public relationship world were when someone of public opinion gets caught cheating on their wives that is a sex addiction problem. It is to the point where Dr. Drew has a reality show trying to treat this so called addiction. Meth is an addiction. Heroine is an addiction. These addiction if not treated eventually kill you or you end up being a homeless guy living in a van down by the river smoking dick for crack. Sex addiction i guess can kill if you gets HIV or AIDS but in these days of modern technology and rapid medical advancements, you can know live a long life after contracting the HIV. Look at Magic Johnson he is still going strong. Now you catch a kid then your financially trapped in prison for the next 18 years and like 50 cent states "have a baby bye me baby be a millionaire." Most women think of their pussy is a form of currency in this modern area like the Ruble or the Pound. With a woman sense of reality wrapped by MTV and VH1 and a new found sense of entitlement to be rich and not have to work the only way the feel they can accomplish this is by hooking up with a rich older man who will pay there bills and comfort them the lives of their sugar daddies. There are web sites dedicated to this idea that if you female, cute, whorish and have a set of fake tits that some desperate guy is going pull the ol' Anna Nicole Smith for you die and leave you his money. Than did work out she is dead and got nothing. But Anna unlike most of these wannabe My Space and Face Book models was a Playmate and a Guess model for several years and made a good living before she married a dieing millionaire. Women will try to trap a man. Women are worse then men, the will manipulate the truth, stalk a mans family, extortionist to the all might pursuit of getting money for nothing. Hookers and Strippers are at least honest. You give them money and they will give you sex and Prostitution is the oldest business still going strong on the planet. Women have figured out the get rich quick game. Sleep with a public figure by throw themselves at them and either get pregnant or hire Gloria Aldered to represent them and get a six figure pay day to keep it out of the press and make it all go away. How ever they got to do it most attractive women will trade pussy for fame and money. Every predominate actress in Hollywood had do suck dick and visit the casting couch at some point in their carrier to advance it. Website like  TheDirty.com have even made a living by calling these girls out and giving them free publicity. They warn men against spend the hard earn money on dream killers as they call them. They even has exposed that there are women out there buy a book called "The Platinum Theory" which is a book teaching women how to hook up with rich men and get their bills paid. Women who buy into this is stupid. There are now 4 ways to get rich in America. 1. Law suits. 2. Lottery 3.be born rich 4. Marry a rich man divorce him ands 3 years and take half. wash rinse and go gold digging for the next victim. For time and argument concerns we will just throw hard work and talent out the window. 

Men your not a sex addict. Sex is normal. We are animals remember in the most sophisticated from. Our need for a man of dominance to spread his seed is seen threw out the history of humanity and in various cultures. Mormons have more than one wife and it their belief. Kings had wives and concubines. I'm going hit on a few points and people real quick just remember your not a sex addict. Now if you were to force yourself on women your either a creeper or a sexual predator and you need to get so help and Bubba in prison will give you all the love you need.  .

1. Tiger Woods - Easy pay day

      Tiger is the best golfer in the world. He likes to go out and party. Hes is the face on a multimillion dollar marketing empire. He sells everything from shavers to Buick's. Hes multinational and sells products all over the world. Even has his own Gatorade. Jordan never had Gatorade. Because of his image he has the boat and the houses and the cars and the Trophy Wife. Why when the world is your oyster do you get married? It's good for the house hold image to sell products. Good role model to kids and to promote his brand. He is easily extortable to protect his image. He bangs his way thought out the world keeps it under wraps but then gets caught. Instead of say this is who I am are marriage is a business proposition deal with it. The tabloids run with it all these girls including his wife are getting paid and he has to save his family. NO he has to save his brand. I know guys who can't even get off with out having a fiance/wife and banging chicks on the side.  Tiger be a man say " I'm rich bitches. Elan Fuck you and Ladies I'm open for business." Instead it going be this whole dramatic thing to get back in the good graces of sponsors. Look win and it will all come back 10 fold. 

2. Kobe Bryant- White girl cry's rape and bangs 2 other dudes right after.

    Lets be honest Kobe straight got hustled. Some young white girl basically (in my mind ) constructed the nature of the encounter for money. She willing slept with Kobe told her boyfriend he flipped and she said she was raped to protect herself. It funny how a girl can be a total whore cheat on her boyfriend say it was I was raped or drugged and it turns out she was willing and didn't want him to be mad. It just happened to a friend of mine brother. So she then decides it rape and show up with 2 other samples of DNA besides Kobe on her panties and trys to get paid. Media destroys Kobe loses his sponsorship with Adidas and among others and is a bad man. Kobe pays the girl to go away and goes on a terror and proves he's the best ever and now make more in endorsement than he did. He still cheats on his wife but she know no one else can put her in the life she has become accustom to so the marriage is now a business partnership. Kobe pays and the girls go away. he learned how to keep his game tight because once again all a cleat chaser wants if free money for something they already have.

3. Jesse James- no one is suprised.

     Jesse you need to be with a stripper or porn star. Your a biker with trash from long beach. Guys like us cannot date Miss American wholesomeness. The sex is boring. No one is surprised you cheated on Sandra. She looks like a dude and isn't even hot. Dude really. You tried suburban life and Hollywood its not you. You and glorified mechanic. You build bad as bikes. Do what you do best. Kick ass and take names and be you. This is great for you and your brand. The Nazi shit I could see coming from a mile away. Your not a sex addict your a scumbag. Be proud of being a scumbag, band tatted whores and sell bikes. You don't need the money. Sandra want a bad boy but as history show us Bad Boys and Good Girls don't make it. Your not the domesticating type. Can keep a dog on a leash. he heeds to run. Go ahead and sleep with as many suicide girls as you can and let Sandra go. I hear Jannie is off the Meth and maybe you kids can give it another go. 

So wrapping up guys are only as good as their options. With money and fame and being a household name the options are greater. If your unhappy in your marriage the be adults get divorced and go bang away. Jeter is doing it right. There nothing wrong with being a playboy and getting the props for doing it right. Happy couples don't cheat. Couples that are a part and too busy for each other will find someone to get they sexy on with are going to cheat and get divorced. We as human beings have become people of convenience. Why go look for sex when your having it thrown right at you for all the wrong reason. Remember people its not love it just sex and if it becomes love than you just not meant to be with that person and move on. If more people were honest and just own being who they are then all this internet reality TV and TMZ drama would go away and so would the attention. Men also have the need just like women to be in control. Some of these situation are about control and not sex and the need to be empowered. Sex in some peoples mind is power. It how a person defines dominance. The only reason people are faithful is a biblical responsibility and the fear of society. Several people experiment with open relationships are are very happy. Porn stars can go to work do gay porn and come home to their wives why do you ask? Because its a Job. Sex Addiction is some clever way of making excesses of cheating to avoid the consequences and make people feel sorry for them. Drop the puppy dog role because I'm not buying it. As for myself, I don't cheat and I don't get into relationships unless I know I can give 100%. If I feel I need to cheat I break it off and move on. I don't make excuses and I would prefer for a girl to hate me for me and not for fucking her over in the end. I also only try a relationship once ever 4 or so years and I am a selfish person and so I stay single. One day I will meet the next on winch is projected based on my current path will be around 2013. So I may sound like a jaded ass in this article but I only trying to speak the truth on how some women operate is all. There are good ones out there somewhere. I think they all live in Europe or maybe Australia.

Racism Now On Xbox Live

You ever sat at home and said to yourself " Where the hell did my kid learn to talk like he's done 20 years in Pelican Bay?" I don't have kids but I do know quite a few parents and I feel parents need to rip the Xbox out of there kids hands and beat the holy shit out of them like my parents did. I would not say I am easily offended; I'm more offensive then most when I speak my mind but I try to remain respectful and never attack anyone on the cultural backgrounds. From time to time I use the work Nigga to my friends who I got a NAACP clearance from but would never say it to a person who I was not friends with or pronounce it in the slavery term of Nigger. I quote rap music from time to time and like the cracker I am will sing along to NWA fuck the police but would not say get up and karaoke it in Harlem at the Apollo Theater. As a society were just not there yet. In My Opinion parents are to busy losing their jobs, having affairs and introverted on their own lives of selfishness to worry about what their kids do until there embarrassed by them or lose the oh so precious social stature. If you were not ready for kids then you should not of had them until you drunken drugged lace clubbing day and band whoring was over. Kid change you and as a parent it is your responsibility to raise them proper. Partying is done, Drunken Orgy's with a band is over. Blowing and then Blowing off you job is over. Going out doesn't exist anymore unless it to catch the latest Pixar Joint at  6:00pm so you can be home in bed by nine. As much as a gift children are the are a huge responsibility like a prison sentence. Do it right and Jr buying you a Mercedes when he gets that big six or seven figure job. Do it wrong he's doing time with his dad in Chino for credit card fraud and a potential race crime because CPS took him away after your 2nd DUI with him in the car.

So to my case in point. I'm a regular on Xbox Live. I know several Admin with in Microsoft and I also work occasionally for WCG and MLG promoting tournaments and coordinating events all over the globe. And they pay me. So when I get so tweenager on ther telling me " He is going to rape me in the ass with a niggers dick then fuck my sister with said same dick" kinda pisses me off and show me why the rest of the world hates the USA. I'm sure one of his moms boyfriends made reference to that at some point in his life but also allowing a kid to play an adult game is also questionable parenting. Look kids you can be tough on line but one day your going see me at some tournament and I will disqualify you for your conduct. I have kick 2 Teams out of the same tournament for being assholes. I have even had a gamer take a swing at me, have me laugh in his face and it took 6 people and 2 security gaurds from keeping me from wrecking the kids life. Good thing he was 17 but still you don't walk up spit and take a swing because you lost and were told going in you should win. We are not entitled to nothing in this world except Death and that is the only guarantee in life.

People to this day are homophobic and Racist and Xbox is there new platform and unfortunately there between the ages of 10-25.

Bottom Line you kill avatars in a fantasy based C+C2 world. You think and probably believe you can hold a gun and kill someone and decide to do it because you play the game and that how the real world is. No the real world is full of guys and gals like myself who will whoop your ass if you ISH with us. I'll fuck a person up and please try to pull a gun on me because I will love to have a reason to claim self defense when I do end your life. I let a lot of things ride because prison, law suits, and losing my job is not worth it. I think Xbox should have shock collars for anyone under 21 in the USA (Europe is not needed cause most games get banned of these nature and people are generally more respectful in online communities) and a list of words should send 4000 volts to their dome one time and there cured. trust me the risk of a swift ass kick triggered by key words will solve a lot of problems in the world. My dad disciplined me as a child and whipped my ass good a few time. I turned out fine. Fuck time out kick you kid in the face it will work better.

Your kids are reflection of you and if you kid is online being a racist bastard then you as his parent must be one to. Put the crack pipe down and raise your kid otherwise don't be surprised when he goes Columbine on your ass or his school and sit there and tell me he was a good kid. I won't buy it. As the great Sheriff Buford T. Pussard would say " When I get home I'm going punch your Mama straight in the mouth." or Chris Rock "America beat you kids. I know if I said thing your kids say my Momma would of  kick my ass." Remember your parents not Friends. 

WAREHOUSE 13 NEW DREAM GIRL CRUSH

So this is my new dreamkiller. She goes by the name of Allison Scagliotti. She is on the TV series on SYFY called Warehouse 13 which thanks to Hulu recommendation I discover this awesome show. She is a youngster I think 20 max. Perfect age. She plays a character that is super smart nerdy computer hacker who is always getting into adventures and trouble on the show. I would like to think of her as that in real life and my late night exploration in my mind. She is a good looking chick. Spunky and goes to school at some JV in the valley. Almost want to make me take a class with her but as we been learning in life the Fantasy is better than reality. She an Actress so she is probably a little shallow and been on TV for a minute.  I tend to dream and aim high in life and with the power on money and wealth one day I will accrued like barrels oil , I just might meet her if she ever does a stint in rehab and loses everything or has a sex tape the leaks out. I would never wish my life on anyone but for now she is my new IT girl. Now she will probably never cross my path because for one I don't stalk chicks. I have far more better things to do with my life and two i would want to actually talk to her and realize she is either a total moron or a bitter jaded bitch. I just like to think of her as the average corny girl I can have a few cocktails with and maybe listen to the new Coheed and Cambria joint with. There new album by the way will be epic like we come to expect from Claudio and Mike and the rest of the gang. She a red head so automatically she is good in bed. I would not change anything about her because she only exist on my lap top on a web site that goal is to liquidize my brain so it can be sucked out easier. Little do they know my mind is like Chernobyl is today; empty vast waste land that is toxic for the next 50+ decades and will in turn kill them. I would never suggest trying to diffuse the ticking Nuke that lives inside my head. I wish I was more normal but I been twisted and jaded to the point of no return. She could live in my mind next protected from the evil in the one happy place once occupied by Clash of the Titans. At least til I lose interest which will happen pretty quick but at least this nerd chick tomboy is my pick of the moment.

Crash of the Titan

Why must Hollywood keep crushing my childhood memories by remaking classic movies into steaming piles of shit. Clash of the Titans was a epic week of slacking in middle school. 7 hours of avoiding work, lectures, and being able to have snacks in class. Awww and there was a girl. Even back then I was the secret hook up guy that no girl want anyone to know there were hooking up. It was one of my better school memories. As with the rest of my life the older I get the more things change and the more people crap on my childhood. Stop remaking classic. Star Wars Runined. G.I. Joe kiss Them good bye, Garfield was an abomination of man and country. Now this. Even Terminator Salvation and following TV series time travel can not save. Can I get a win here people. What's next Voltron ? Tron? A-Team?. Alf? Yes, Hollywood is going for the Knock Out blow. Next they will make a Zelda movie and destroy the last shreds of my childhood. They already took Mario Brothers from me and the Ninja Turtles.

What the Fuck is wrong with people in Hollywood. You cannot  recreate and capture a virgin raw original idea that was epic at the time it was conceived and relative the moment. What was great about that one moment in time is how it changed you life and related to the events at the time. Madonna will never be as good as she was when she was the material good. She gets close but will never be the original. Just like Prince will never be as good as Purple rain and Stallone will never be as good as John Rambo First Blood or Rocky. I would like to be in one of these cracked out meetings where dip shits are say " You know what we really need to do is make another Scarface. People will line up for miles to see this and lets cast Carlos Mencia to play Tony. Well have Michael Bay direct it and lets get the writers from Top Gun to hammer out a script. Epic 100 million box office on open weekend. Lets just Fuck the American people out of 14 bucks by making it 3-D as well. " Well old ass crust Asshole Holly Weird society  Fuck you right back.

As for the movie it moved rather quick and the action scenes were average at best. Medusa look like the snake from Anaconda and I'm glad it can still find rolls in the tight economy because we know the world dose not need Anaconda 7. The dude that I called Chewback the black magain pile of twigs was cool in the effect department but I figured when he pushed his Energon Cube into his chest he should of blown that snake to all hell. Also the climax to the move of defeating the Cracken was lame. Hey buddy look into the eyes for your ex-girlfriend and you turn to stone. Doesn't that happen in real life usually? I'm just saying. And no R2-d2 owl. The owl was the best part. "just leave that here we don't need it." the owl would of save half of your asses. I'm also glad to see Hades is still smoking Heroine and looks like Gerard Way via the Three Cheers from Sweet Revenge album. Flash back off Gerard on a booze and coke bender. Good times. I wonder if Hades found his precious.

The only 4 saving points of the movie.
1. Drunklando and I talk shit and made jokes threw out the whole flick. I'm sure we would of pissed every one else off in the movie theater if it wasn't such a pile of crap. We made sure people were entertained. Imagine Science Mystery Theater 3000 status.
2. Alexa Davalos as Andromeda was blazing hot with her lazy eye and lazy boob. I now remember why toga party's are always, always a great idea plus she was immortal which is nice. Also when pops give you a chick for saving the world you know your getting laid.
3. The Persian hunters were hilarious. the whole movie I was thinking " Tango Sukka". If you gamer you'll get that joke (MW2).
4. The Expandable trailer 2 words "HOLY SHIT".

Save your money spend your dollar at Red Box. Unless you need to see it in 3D then realize Avatar takes this movie out to the back 40 and puts it down with a .45 cal bullet like a sick Pegasus.

VIC YOU DREAM GIRL IS OFF THE MARKET.

ADAM COROLLA AND ISLA FISHER GET MARRIED. OH SORRY THAT'S SASHA BARON COHEN.

This is about as good as when Tom Green and Drew Barrymore got married. Except the British version. Crazy rich actor at the top of his trade marries crazy smoking hot sexual actress who my have peaked in her trade. Last time Tome Carrier is not existent and divorced and alone banging club rats and the other one is one of the top 10 paid actress in Hollywood. I give it 3 years tops and i think Isla hopefully pulls a Tiger Woods on him or a Jesse James on him and he divorces her for say sleeping with this guy. I wonder if she need a personal ass-istant. I would love to pour barbecue sauce on her and treat he like a Mc Ribb. I would give her a wonderful full 2 minutes of her life than ask her to make me a oreo cookie shake and play xbox with me. A while a go on Vic blog, warmcupofshutthehellup.blogspot.com, He gave his critics choice award to this chick. I admit for a Britt she is hot and likes to get naked and show her nice natural Brest off. She is a top Hit on Mr. Skin.com and is a red head. Red Heads are animals in bed. Some of my best times have been with a certain red head who name we don't mention. 6 years ago a crazy red head changed my life. We did things in places we don't mention. I was a Chemical Romance for about 8 months but one of the best 8 months of my life followed by 2 of the worst years of my life. Yes is was worth it. I measure how much I love some one by how long the pain last afterward. I'm Just messed up in the head like that but I grow a a lot and learn more about myself in the darker times of my life.

Anyways Sasha or Borat or Bruno or who even he is, is comic genius. He lands a hot ass chick with reinforces my belief the hot girls like funny guys. Him also being rich is probably a bonus as well. If you look at it you can be an ugly comedian and achieve wealth, fame and a smoking hot dime piece like Isla. Give me hope my fat ass will date a hot chick on day. I have depth and comedic range some days when I'm not blow up my twitter with emo tweets. People have told me I should do stand up but I'm afraid that if I do and some one boo's me I probably pull a Ron Artest and knock the heckler in the crowd out with a mic stand. The irony is back in the day Vic dressed up as Ali G for Halloween. He was just 2 movies short of landing his dream chick. On the up side He does have a hot wife and 2 awesome kids and a kick ass moto bike. I say he doing OK and nothing a couple of cocktails cant fix. To the ones that got away, dream girls well never bang, beer commercial chicks that are dating 3's when there 10's, and the hipster who broke on a fixie and lives of his low self esteem working 2 jobs girlfriend, this bud light lime is for you.

Just Another Whore...

Basically another ugly chick runs out gets a bunch of Tattoos, becomes a Suicide Girl or whatever and Is a Dream Killer. This chick that let Jesse James bone her in the popper probably is about his speed. Sandra Bullock is not as hot a people would like to think. But she is rich and normal. Jesse isn't a normal dude. He like these kind of chicks. I agree until they become My space whores. Now don't get me wrong this is my type of crazy but she has a kid and an ex husband at 24. More like 30 kiddos. or she just that beat. Take away the make up and the tattoos and beside so tits that sag a little she got a face like murder. Waking up to her would be basically shooting your self in the head. OH SHIT I FUCK A DUDE KILL ME QUICK. If I was a rich man I would fuck her a few times and leave her. If i was me I would fuck her for a night and leave before the cocaine and Jack Daniels wore off and hope my dick would not fall off in the morning. OH shit this could be my ex with few photo shop tattoos and moving another few around. She will ruin your life. She the kind of chick bikers go for. Hell I know. Trust me. She is a Whore. I love whores. I guess I need to be stupid to ruin a good marriage to get some strange. Jesse Don't fuck strippers and porn stars when know how the last one ended with you getting your head cracked opened. All they want is money and attention and will use and ruin anyone to get it. Did no one pay attention to Tiger Woods taking a nine iron to the dome. Face it If you fuck attention whore and decide they suck in bed and your wife not bad, Fuck ugly ones no one is going to believe anyways and not My Space Whores. Internet celebrities or models are look for exposure to get paid. Jesse you just fuck up your marriage so this chick can hustle you. I know the Chopper business isn't and Monster garage fuck you over but dude common. Crazy guys like us do these things but even I know better and Now Jannie can blow holes in you child support case. Get ready to start righting checks. Dude its cool but common was it worth it? Did she at least let you ATM her? Dirty Sanchez? Or did she just lay there Limp as you supposedly fucked her. Look It doesn't count if she is not into it. Best of Luck buddy.

OBAMA'S HELTHCARE

While the world was watching Kansas University get there asses kick in basketball, Our President got the House To pass the evil health care plan. The socialism is coming and the heath care industry will crumble. Next thing you know we will be all out in the streets broke and poor and the rich dictators will steam roll us with tanks and kill six million of us in the streets of Portland. The republican will over throw the government and move the national head quarters to Fox News and the country will be in chaos. Oh no. But to cut out all the bullshit and all the media spin, health care reform is long over do in our country. Socialized health care work in Hawaii a state in the United States. It works all over Europe and in other countries that are Democratic country and even in some country that are not democratic. This is going hurt commercialized health care the most. Not Joe Citizen who has been getting raped with health care rates every year for the few who can afford it for themselves let alone their families. Change is a good thing. If most Americans would get their fat asses off the couch and actually do something like travel out side the good old USA they could see the benefits of what Socializing health care could be.

Health care is a billion dollar a year industry. There in the business of making money. Health insurance is that. Insurance the most company expect you to use maybe once a year and you deductible and monthly premium . So you make 26 payments of $80.00 a pay day for a total of $2080.00 a year. An average doctor visit with out insurance is $150.00. The most basic prescription is a Z-pac Antibiotics that go for $89.99 at your local CVS. In Mexico, the same Z -pack is 15 dollars even with out a prescription and about the same in Canada. Same manufacture same everything. Prescription Drug company's charge the same price for medications because most pharmacy's buy in bulk. On average they make 300- 500 percent profit top sort the pills and bill you insurance. so on $90 dollars plus you 15 dollar co pay in essence the large business are making $90.00 dollars of your insurance. So for the average person you pay $2080.00 a year for $220.00 in services. There for the insurance company makes a profit. Now factor in what they choose to pay the care providers and contracts and change every year in coverage from you job trying to find the cheapest rate and sometime you find out your current doctor my not accept you new coverage. God forbid you lose you job and get you "cobra" coverage...shit will kill you like a cobra in cost.

Medicare is for old people receiving Social Security benefits. Medical is for people on Welfare. Free government medical the people will stay broke to receive because here is the secret... It good everyone accepts it and did I mention its free to them. Our taxes pay for broke people to get free medical. I recently applied for Medical but I make more then $13,500 a year and did not qualify. Obama is on the right path. Give me my medical and let me be. And if I loose my job, I still have coverage. Really?

Why should drugs cost me more with out insurance in the US than in Canada and Mexico? Why should I get a bill for 2.5k go to the Emergency Room if I make more the 13.5k a year and can't afford health care? Because health care is Big business. Hospital are expensive to operate, drug companies need to have their CEO have access to a private jet and bonuses. Doctors take an oath but unless you have the right coverage their services have a premium. That's why for plastic or electric surgeries those doctors make bank. Fake tits are not free. Unless you sleep with a rich old dude but some one has to pay. With everyone and their brother wanting to sue for everything doctors won't even take a look at you as a friend unless you insured or come to their office. Or the will for a price. Trust me. Our government is bleeding form being ass raped by such companies. They want to make it on par for the average citizen as it is in most other civilized countries. Health Care industry is going to take the hit. Republicans are back by them and this will help our government get at least something hopefully in check.

ME VS THE BRO VS THE BARTENDER

So last night I'm chilling out after work and getting my Call of Duty MW2 on and my Twitter is off the hook. SXSW is on fire I guess. I'm pissed because I planned on being there this weekend but my store manager quit and fuck me out of my chance to go. Fuck My Life. Fuck All of you Mother Fuckers. Every one is Premed, Partying, Amazing bands, Its fucking a 5 day party. I so bummed out on this whole thing. It's bullshit. I am stuck here and all my friends are out of town.
So to fend for myself I decided to wonder down around 10:30 to The Filling Post a local bar that the girls work in their bra's and panties. I have been going there with my roommate for a while and there this on girl that works there that shares my warped and twisted sense of 2005 music that im trapped in. I been going in on a few night to hang out a get a little attention and she pass along her cell number. I not stupid I know she works on tips, former stripper former escort but common she works in her under ware you know she fuck up in the head. I like damaged good. I wish i didn't but I am fucked up in the head as we all know.

So I walk in she pours me a beer and ask me to play some music because she is board and ask about my week. We chit chat a little and she ask why am I so sad. Why do people ask me what is wrong with me all the time. Maybe I should go back to doing coke and being on one all the time but I'm broke and that shit turns me into a person I learned I can't live with. It makes me hate my life even more and I tend to loose more than I gain. Yes I'm a little worn out because work is crazy and all my friends are at a huge fucking party and I should be there getting shit housed and shredding chicks like the Secret skate spot in the dez. I'm depressed and emo. Look at my drunk tweets any given night. Plus not to mention this was the time last year I lost everything. My chick, my job, my financial ruin and all the anger that went along with it. I walk this world with my sins strapped heavily on my back. Until I deal with them and get back to where I was My LIFE BLOWS. Stop asking me why I'm sad.

So as the night goes on she disengages the target know as Saturn as soon as some bro walks in. The want to take her to Cancun on his boat and all this bull shit. Dude was driving a 99 accord. Last time I checked an accord can't tow a boat. His ATM card got declined along with 2 Credit cards. I'm sitting there with a new Sonbol watch, 600 cash in my pocket and a Credit car that works. I found it funny a fake trip by some dude straight out of the DC shoe catalog circa 2004. If I was willing to take a spike, shrink my balls, live in the gym for 4 hours a day to be all bro out to pull ex-stripper tail and have a rage complex.... I rather be dead. Fuck fake as people and stupid ass chicks. I happy I'm real. I should bullshit a girl a little more but the lies are getting harder to remember. Any idiot can Lie to a girl but when you realize you really do like her and tell her the truth and confess, any intelligent chick is going bounce out and bone your friends to get revenge. This is why I like older women. girls in the early 20 annoy the shit out of me. Give me my beer and shut the hell up. I'm not going to tip any more for fake attention. I know I'm not going to fuck you unless your drunk and I have coke or weed or shit I don't do... anymore. You cannot hustle me. Do you know who I am ? I'M MOTHER FUCKING KING KONG OF HUSTLING. I RUN THIS SHIT AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT BITCHES.

So I finished up My beer drove to Anaslime to get Alberto's the one thing I miss the most about riverside (or Santana's) and had my fat ass some carne and rolled tacos and went home and passed out. I will never drop my standards for stupid chicks and that's why I probably have no game.

St. Paticks Day with Dorian Jones

So since all my friends that I would party with are out of town for South By South West (SXSW), I planed on taking the night off and just going home to chill out. Too many cops are out on drinking holidays and it is not work getting a DUI. I had a hellish day at work and was finishing up my day and decided to check in on twitter for any SXSW up dates. I noticed that Dorian hit me up and was in Santa Monica. He was looking for a place to drink and get laid. I suggested he head over to The Daily Pint because there would be no cover and I would swing through and have a drink with him. Little did I know tonight would be Epic.

So I arrive at The Pint and find parking right away. I walk in and the atmosphere is great. I use to work at The Pint and I try to always go "Home for the Holidays" and it is a great local drinking spot. Limited Hipsters mostly business crowd and normal people. Lots of bird getting drunk look to have fun. So I start playing this smoking hot chick at pool and she broke so one game done and gone back to her fake boyfriend. Dorian arrives and we start shooting the shit and I meet these two Koren girls. So the night goes on I get play from one of the girls and Dorian comes off as a Gay guy and a Creeper to them. Dorian is a weird dude but a good guy. The more I hang out with him the more I get him and I understand where the girls were coming from.

The girl I'm prospecting is a real ball buster. She reminded me of an ex and her personality was that of a crazy bitch. Craziness turns me on for some reason. I I put up with her abuse for most of the night and then we walk across the street to the park and begin negotiations. I n the end we hooked up on a side street and did our thing. It was good but once again will I ever hear from her. She seemed to get me but she was very cynical, very forward and very brash. All quality I like in a girl. She had a take an opinion on everything and could question a conversation with playful banter. She was no bullshit. Direct and took me time to adjust. I so refreshing to talk to some one who was real. But in my life they come and go. Well see if she calls on my services again and if she does I will be ready, Weapons Dressed and Ready To Kill.

L4P CARS AND COFFEE IRVINE, CA

This morning I got up at the God Forbidden Hour of 7am. I have only seen 7am when I am still up partying from the night before. I am not a morning person and have had several alarm clock commit suicide by the evil glare I give when they go off before 9am. I'm to alarm clocks what George Clooney is to Goats. So as I'm half a sleep I roll it to Cars and Coffee in Irvine, Ca around 7:30. L4P had an impressive showing an I could spot the Al and Ed's Autosound Cars. The crowd was good. The cars were clean. The coffee was strong. I like my chances.

I meet up with my friends the Steve's. We walk around had a burrito and some java and by my 5th cigarette I woke up. My boss was a no show but we touched base and I got my marching orders to go to work and had to suspend my plans of a day of cars, Frozen Adult Beverages , and debauchery. I'm an interactive guy. I'm always a little stand offish at first because like a James Bond (Connery), I reading the crowd, surveying the situation, and calculating my environment. Everyone except Andrew and his smoking hot girlfriend was to wrapped up in there click to even notice the guy who puts in all the leg work to make their exotic cars one of a kind. I'm active on the forum but people from on line always disappoint in real life. Since my boss is the man who pays the advertising bill for the site I know he gets all the love. He was not there so on this day I was invisible. Or like a house hand during the slavery days; I just do the work and the "Masta" gets the credit. I am ok with this except when I make eye contact and try to introduce my self and people just walk away. I guess until the 97 Saturn is upgraded to a Ferrari Skud I will remain anonymous in their circle.

I drive a Saturn because I have fallen on some hard times and made some bad decisions. I love cars and have maybe turned down several opportunities to potentially make "good money", but I love to build cars. It my passion. I rather be doing this, living off top ramen and 99 cent slices of pizza from 7-11 than waking up everyday and hating the world more than I already do. I am the best at what I do. Period. The best. I am a real person who live life. I strive to be well off one day but until that day comes I do what I love for a living. My two guest of the day are both exotic car owners looking to get involved with the community and were turn off by the whole thing. I will remain to be very active on L4p when times permits and savor the online relationship I have formed. When I consider some one a friend who I respect, I will do anything for them. Ask anyone who know me you need something and I have a connection or if I can do it; I HOOK IT THE FUCK UP.

So that's how my day started. Tonight I may swing by Japan LA or head to the desert for some much need R&R. But for now I grind my day away and try to make some money.

Hipsters and Vegan Lake

Last Night Drunklando and I embarked Into the Hipster Headquarters known as Cha Cha in Silver Lake. The night began with a stop at City Sip. I did not know this place was a wine and cheese bar. We meet up with some old friends and talk about feeling out of place. I am a dive bar guy. Jack and Coke, Coors Light, Bud Light, or PBR. This is my extent of booze I like to consume. Very hipster joint with fixies and bad hair cuts. I hate this place. I asked for a nice red wine from Italy and I get a rose from Napa, Ca. I'm not a wine buff but I have drank very nice bottles of wine before and know a little. I do own a few bottles of wine I have received as gifts over the years ranging from the 1970 to 2003. It is a small collection but it is mine and I did my researcher today my cheapest bottle is valued at 721.30. So I was a little disappointing because there wine selection is basically the Bevmo bottle of the month. OK art small place. Tip on the Sip, save your money and buy the bottle from Bevmo and get the second for 5 cents. Cheaper than one glass and the hipster art. I shit better paintings.

So as on conversation goes on we tell stories on how me and Dunklando became friends and just good conversation. We leave in a jeep that almost killed us and the driver said it a "common problem". We are car guys go the the recall done. It is not a common problem. Don't bullshit car guys. So we end up at Cha Cha in one piece alive and with a wine buzz ruined.

It felt good walking in to Cha Cha like a cross between Cabo San Lucus and Johnny's Saloon in Huntington Beach. The my night takes a turn for the worse. Hipster Headquarters, Vegans, Old burn out musician DJ, and a contest for who had the most lines shaved in their heads. I punk the old burnout DJ on Dog Tow. My Mom and Dad were there I know my shit. My Dad was on the cover of 4 skateboarding magazines back in the 70's. The conversation turned for the worst with the vegan as her boyfriends start sexting her. Typical LA trash. Aspiring director going no where. If your a director and have no equipment on unemployment you basically garbage. I own a god damn camera. Give me a break you going to sleep you way thru some 5 minute garbage short because you have a face like murder and out of touch with reality. The bullshit is so thick in LA LA land that I was in shit creek with out a paddle a raft or a snorkel. I felt like Clyde Owens in Sin City drowning in the tar pits. But no hot Asian named Miko was going to save my night. I got a little revenge at the taco truck and proceeded to drive home blasting The Bled, Slipknot, and Alexisonfire.

The whole night I felt awkward. I might as well of been from a foreign country. I felt like a Jew in the middle of a Hitler rally in Nazi Germany. I get out spoken when I am uncomfortable and babble about politics to see people reaction and entertain my self. I survived another hollywood adventure. One day people will wake up and realize being a broke music Nazi going no where in a band that suck isn't the life. Get a job loser and stop bleed our state for unemployment. I'm tired of getting an IOU for my state tax refund. Bye the way the only bright spot 2.50 PBR on draft.

Black Jesus

This is comedy Black Jesus kill the police.


I paid 10 dollars for this footage. I own the rights. copy write 2010.

The Stripper vs. The Bled

Last Night, unlike most nights I had plans. I don't make any plans on a daily basis except to have an occasional cocktail, clear out my HULU, and murder innocence bystanders on Xbox Live. Current game is MW2. My night was going to consist of going to The Hustler Club in Westminster, Ca and supporting the local chapter of single mothers and meth addicts. I do my part to keep my part to donate to such community out reach programs. It has been a good year since I have been to the Huss which was a weekly standard in my life when Me and Bonkers use to support the Local Redlands Chapter of this fine charity. I made plans with my current roommate and some of the aspiring adult female entertainers that work at the local watering hole next to my house. Lets be honest Bikini Bars are strip clubs with out nipples and lap dances. So my plans were set last week and on my way home from work I get a phone call from none other than Drunklando my best friendnemy.

" Dude The Bled are playing Chain Reaction tonight....In 30 minutes... can we get tickets? I'm leaving the desert now I'll be there in an hour". What the fuck? The Bled. Bash at the Beach Bled? Arizona's finest who use to play bash at the beach, get shit faced drink and shit on shit The Bled. James and Rossmosis? I have plans. I just got done working with fiberglass for 8 hours, I'm tired and all I want to do is make excuses why I can't go on short notice. I come up with an answer as my mind is internally fighting with the possibility of seeing titties, try to get these to girls back to my house to bone, and finally get my dick rolled after a touch of a dry spell versus a Bromance date.
The fight rages on in my mind for well over 5 minutes and in my life that 5 hours to a mortal. The caculating the probabilities on how the outcome of my night would be determined by the next word I utter out of my mouth. After careful consideration I decide fuck it I'll do both. The Huss and Chain are 10 minutes apart. I'll go get my buzz on kill some tacos and go watch The Bled. Tonight we rage in hell. Will tonight be one of the classic nights were we're up thrashing so poor kids house of hotel til 5 am like back in the day. Will there be any chicks to sink my teeth in to and corrupt while she is riding the sexual adrenaline rush of the Bled? Will I wake up in a place I have never seen with 6 dudes passed out in a room with some on pissing in the corner? Will it be as good as it was from back in the days. Will it be Bash at the Beach status?

So as my hopes race and excitations rises I get home to a roommate ready to go out for a night or pre planned debauchery. "The girls will meet us there" normally means they canceled. They did. We get to the Huss and there is no seating so we stand near the wall as the local talent starts to heat up on stage. This Dancer I will on make reference to as Brandon Lee daughter who like to work out alot, was more Chiseled than most of the guys there, and look like she cuts her victims up during sex took the stage. I would of been in love but she was more butch than Ellen D in combat boots and a lumberjack flannel. I order my bud lights got my buzz on and left @ 10 to get to Chain for The Bled.

The Bled killed it. I was heartbroken my one time Drunk Jack Daniels Lover Ross was no longer in the band. Jeremy still shreads on the Schecter Guitar. They add a key board player? Not the whiskey drinking band I remember with a new drummer that look like a modern day Judith. The songs still make me want to jump of a stage and destroy the 100 pound emo kids like a nuclear bomb dropped on Hiroshima, but thankfully Jeepers Creepers did that for me. 6 times. Drunklando snapped photos and I was Stage Right head banging to the classics like Dale Earnhardt. Passion for there music still burns in my loins and makes me fell young and in love with a special girl and brings back the summer of 2004. Only think missing was Brent Vann, Homer, Frog, Papa Denny, BJ, Lonnie project and Breakdance Vietnam. I miss BDV more after this show and the memories of better day. BDV were to this point the best days of my life. Tthe 5 year party that never ended and I was lucky enough to have a stage view of.

James still remember me by name. Shot the shit for a second. Said hi to some old friends and departed into the night. One of the best live acts you can see. Buy there album and get to a show. Your children you will make after seeing this show will be more intelligent for it. Stalk them on twitter cause James in very entertaining. My night was amazing to this point but was it over?

No it was going to get better. I headed back to my The Huss after their set and arrived around 11:30. Paid my 5 bucks again to get back in and had a cold beer waiting for me. My roommate at this point had 8 Jack and Cokes and a few lap dances. I focus my attention to the stage and make eye contact with this nice looking french emo-curious brunette. As she works the pole with the grace of an ice dancer with a look of a gypsy, I choose to sip my beer and enjoy her show. As she exits the stage with no more the 10 dollars in tips she make he slender way towards me in the crowd. I am in the back at a table by myself closing my tab planning my depart into the darkness of the night when she approaches me. Like a bullet threw Kevlar she leans over with her warm lips and kisses me.

The balls on this bitch. Your a stripper hot and sweaty smelling like the current bed bath and beyond whore spray and put her std infested lips on my. All I could think is I need tetanus shot and a mint because my breath was kicking a little. I open my mouth with the rage of curiosity about to blast this bitch and a thank you comes out. I must be drunk. I small talk with her for a second with my verbal back handed complements and she is unphased. She ask me if I would like a dance and I say no. " I don't pay for play sweetheart. Your hustle might work on the average looser that comes in her to get sloppy drunk with aspirations to get laid but I rather keep my 20 bucks and go jack off to You Porn when I get home. " Her response was " Well I'm off and all I need is a shower and to jack off myself. I don't like what I do I just do it for the money and most guy never resist my charm. Your different would you like to maybe come over and talk or play some Xbox or watch a movie ? I live in Hunntington." My counter follows " What game? I have to work early but a) your not going to call. b) thanks for being nice to a fat fuck like me but I got to work tomorrow and I don't know you. Your proablly going to rob me and then I will have to kill you. " Her Counter point " MW2 and don't be a pussy. Your afraid of a girl? let me guess your gay? "
So the negotiations goes on for about 10 minutes and I give her my number and leave. 15 min later she calls " I'll be home in 5". I get her address and swing by my house and grab my Glock 23c because if this bitch is going jack this mother fucker, I'm going out in a hail of bullets. I show up play some MW2 co-op for about an hour or so and having a good time. She is in her PJ's a far different cry from the Whore spray state of 2 hour before. She shows me her bedroom and we close the door and play a different game til about 5am when we both are exhausted and dose off to sleep. I awake in the morning late for work and let myself out. I left her a message oh her Xbox live when I got home. The future is unclear if I will ever see that stripper again. Yes I wrapped my tool. The ball is in her court and I kept my money in my pocket. She was a sweetheart from France. I hope one day I don't have to put a bullet in her head for being a terrorist like From Paris with Love.

Hello People I'm Saturn Killed

Welcome to my life. For the past couple of years I have tried to get my thoughts and opinions post on some of my friends blogs. So after years of rejection and peoples agendas, I have decided to start my own. In other words... Fuck You Blog World.
I am not a writer. I am just a guy living my life in Southern California that chooses to be me. I don't really give a shit about a lot of things. I am a weird dude but I'm honest with my ideas and thought and try to be original and think out side the box. My grammar will be ruff at times and filled with alcoholic slurs. I will try my best to communicate as best as I can but there are no promises and no misconceptions. Remember this is my world your entering in to. My head will be your playground. You will love me and hate me all at the same time, this I promise.

I'm a 29 year old single capricorn. I am a selfish person. I do look out for my friends and when shit hits the fan, I am the one person who will speak up, get your back and fight til the end. People annoy me to the point where I potentially implode on the inside and go off and spew the truth. Like it or not I don't like you; I choose to tolerate you. I have few friends and people in my life that understand me and my since of humor. As outgoing as I can be. As Emo as the world will allow me to be. There was once a line people didn't cross. I will cross that line doing a buck sixty and will not feel bad about it.
I work in the Automotive and Entertainment industry which will occasionally poke its head in and say Hi. But I'm about more than that I will share my views on politics, women, men, society, video gaming, and occasionally my friends and family. Like Jim Rome said" I'm not for everybody. Give me two weeks and if you don't like me give it two more. I'm not for everyone".
I have decide to do this as my form of stress relief and to clear my head and provide entertainment. Pure entertainment. Don't go off and kill yourself, don't try to hunt me down because your kids are reading this and your a bad parent. I will answer any questions, tell my brand of Saturn Tails and Stories. I'm not looking to hurt anyone yet but just remember on the other side of this monitor there a guy who likes a good gun fight. I been to war zones and one of the 10% of American who have been out of the country and adjectivally have a passport. Hawaii, the Florida Keys, and Mexico do not count. Hell SoCal is Mexico. Look around Mexicans have taken California back. There even allowed in Entratainment like the whitest Mexican ever, George Lopez. Why do all rich ethnic men marry white women? The answer: As long as they have a Amex and a 20 something year fucking their brains out they'll marry anyone as long as they don't have to work and their husbands are gone a lot. Prozac (cocaine) on speed dial, a cocktail and no pre-nub. There business women getting paid to play. The men are the dumb ass who marry them a pay to keep them and then cry when they take half.